The Day After...

Unseen is that which goes bump in the night
Intangible thoughts on this untamable fright
I sniff till I smell the odor of my failure
My mind in the grasp of this livid torn jailer
I look to the numbness that I need to cope
Put a smile on my face as if there is hope
But reality tells me that I'm wasting away
By the day I just stray from the reasons to stay
Still there it sits with an ominous presence
Taunting and mocking my pleads for some pleasance
I'm walking on eggshells trying to rest on my laurels
But it remains on my thoughts and it's bending my morals
I must stay in place like my feet have been planted
And wait for selfish needs to be disenchanted
There are moments of clarity in this tightrope act
And fact is, this act has no measure for tact
I am playing chess with my life thinking 5 steps ahead
Only if I don't win I'll most likely be dead
Or I'll be wishing for death and release from my pity
I never knew this would be both so great and so shitty